I have a standing coffee date on Mondays at 10 AM. Really, the coffee isn't the focus. Often we drink water, but our appointment stands and it is one of my favorite 2 hours each week. The 2 hour mark is also a negotiable. We set the alarm for 12 PM and then snooze it for another 20 minutes.
Tracie and I lived in the same apartment complex in Maryland. I moved to Virginia first and then 6 months later she came to visit me and fell in love with our town. Her family decided to move here and we were so excited to be close again. Unfortunately, we both got busy in different worlds. She got involved in MOPS and I got involved in a local church. We made different friends, went to different churches, and our kids went to different schools.
After a few years, we realized we never saw each other. It was pathetic. We would see each other at the pool and my friends would introduce us. Here is my friend that I have known longer than anyone in town and no one knew we loved each other! So...we decided to make a date.
For the past several years, we have been intention about connecting and investing in each other's lives. We have challenged one another in our parenting styles, or political views, and our hopes and dreams for our families. We have laughed and cried and sometimes both in the same date. It has been life-giving and truly a gift.
The past few weeks, my life has been a bit hectic. One of the Mondays the kids had off for Martin Luther King Jr. Day. Another Monday, the kids had a 2 hour delay so we met on Friday instead. We still try to squeeze it in when we can. I have felt a desire for some down time, but haven't had a window to fit it in.
Sunday evening I looked around my kitchen and it was a mess. We had small group sign-ups that morning, I was still getting tickets ready for the middle school, and I needed to wash everyone at least 2 articles of clothing for the next school day. I was beat and I considered canceling (for a minute). Philip said, "Why don't you just do it next week?" I was quick to inform him that if we didn't do it on Monday it would be hard to get it in. My week is so much better when we see each other.
Philip asked if Tracie had any friends. I cracked up. Tracie has tons of friends. She is one of those Southern girls that is nice to everyone. "She must really like you then if she wants to see you." How do I agree without sounding cocky? Honestly, I think our feelings for each other are mutual. We are both busy. Our lives are full. We both have a lot of friends, but we truly love our Monday coffee dates.
Before I went to bed, I conquered the laundry, picked up the kitchen, and cleaned up "enough" to be friendship ready. That morning I had a few things to get done before our 10 AM appointment. I moved quickly. For the first time since before Christmas, we sat and ignored the alarm completely. I think she left sometime before 1 PM. We are all caught up until next Monday.
Getting together with friends doesn't just miraculously happen. We get busy doing life, taking care of our families, working, and church involvement. Weeks turn into months...and then years. I have found seasons where I have been surrounded by people, but felt lonely. Then there were seasons where I hung out mainly at home, but the connections I had during the week were intentional and meaningful.
After Tracie and I said our goodbyes, I started to think about taking more time for intentional connections. I have friends I am very close with that I certainly don't see enough. They are my pool friends or my PTO friends or my church friends, but I am not being intentional about spending time connecting with these women. I believe I need to take more time to know and be known by my friends. My Mondays are full, but there are 6 other days.
Lord, help me to be relational-ly intentional this year. I am thankful for the friends you have given me. Help me to grow in my ability to be a faithful friend, a great listener, and an advice giver only when asked!
Living Completely Undone
I am a girl passionately in love with Jesus, my husband, and my children. I am forever learning how to live a life completely undone for my God. This blog is about my journey and a few funny stories in between.