There have been times in my Christian walk where I have had the faith to believe for the impossible. I knew in my heart and in my soul that God had spoken something specific and concrete and I had the faith to see it through.
Lately it seems that the fire of my faith has dimmed some and my belief has turned from "this is my calling" to "what if is isn't." I have often asked Philip, "What if this is it? What if we were just meant to raise our family, be involved in the local church, be trustworthy, be encouraging, and faithful? In the end, would I feel that it has been enough?"
To have this dialogue pains my heart because I believe God has shown me more. But what if? I don't want to waste my life and my dreams on something that will just distract me from my present.
Dreams are scary because there is an element of discontentment in the present, not because what I am doing today is meaningless, but because God has shown me more.
Yesterday, Dominic Russo from Missions.me spoke at church. He said, "Just like the destiny of an acorn is a tree and that everything that seed needs to become a tree is there, I believe the moment that God plants the seed in your spirit and God plants a dream in your heart, the capacity to make that dream, that vision, that destiny a reality exists by virtue of the fact that God put it there."
Sometimes I forget that God gave me dreams and I doubt. Sometimes I look at the impossibility and lose heart. Sometimes I try to formulate a different plan, a different vision, and different dream. Sometimes I tell myself that if my life stays exactly the same...I will be content.
I have yet to be convinced.
This year, I desire to passionately pray for the dreams that God placed within me heart. I desire to live life well today...while believing in the dreams for tomorrow.
Living Completely Undone
I am a girl passionately in love with Jesus, my husband, and my children. I am forever learning how to live a life completely undone for my God. This blog is about my journey and a few funny stories in between.